The Not-so-Good Ways to Cope! (Uh-Oh)

Whether it is the week of midterms or you know you have an overwhelming day approaching, everyone has different stresses that can easily drive them up the wall. Usually in these stresses is when people will find the ways in which they cope. Unfortunately, sometimes they see the coping techniques they use are actually making the worrying situations worse. In this case, they are coping negatively.

Bear with me as I tell you a story…

Once there was a girl who at the young age of 13 years old was told she has mild depression on top of dealing with many previous years of unnecessary stress that was added to her life. It wasn’t shocking news to her, because she already had an inclination that she had something wrong with her.  Before she was diagnosed she had already knocked herself down and had given herself a low self-esteem and self-value. 

As a result she started to put herself in danger. She would purposely put herself in risky situations that could possibly end her life. She would stay up late and wake up early, barely eat, and harm herself on a daily basis. When she had a terrible day she would put a razor to her skin. In return she was left with wounds that she would have to hide and later feel ashamed of. It was a never ending process and her therapist had to really work with her to change these ways. Eventually, she found other ways to cope with her sadness and self hatred. She is doing very well and is feeling great lately. With a bittersweet heart, that girl is me.

It took me some time, but I eventually realized the actions I did against myself I were not helping to fix the problem. I learned that cutting my body only made me feel worse in the end, and I had to go an extra mile to cover up what I did. I was coping very negatively. In the process of understanding how bad I was coping I realized other thoughts I had were affecting me negatively.

Here are some coping mechanisms people may not realize that are negative:

• Driving fast in a car
• Chewing your nails
• Avoiding friends and family
• Yelling at others
• Procrastination

Some others, maybe obvious ones, are self-mutilation, using drugs and alcohol, negative criticism of oneself, lying, eating too much or too less, and doubt. If you know what negative coping techniques are you’re one step ahead because you can avoid them from the beginning. I’m glad to say I found ways to cope positively, although it is still hard at times. I believe everyone can find a way to escape their negative coping mechanisms, no matter how hard the struggle can be. 

If you or anyone you know has a tendency to use negative coping techniques, either talk to them or seek help. It is important that you keep yourself safe and healthy. If you ever need someone to talk to, or know someone who is in danger, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-8255. Don't be hesitant to call, trust me. 

In all you do, know you are worth it, no matter the situation.

Keep Calm & Cope On!